Witches and Fishes

part 2 of Can’t Catch Me Now (find part 1 at this link)

***

Mother was a witch,

my father caught fish

together they raised

one beautiful girl

and by raised I mean

neglected,

(TW: neglect

and abuse

so skip this account

if you can’t stand the truth)

In my earliest memories

I ate food

from garbages

because my dad was never home

and I went around town

with rashes under my gown

where my mother tested ointments

she could sell to cure ailments

of the log house neighbors,

and whenever the neighbors saw me

they smiled and said how adorable I looked

in my dresses

and how

my mother

helped them

so much

with her cures

and wouldn’t I tell her

thank you

for them?

And I said, “Yeah”

and one time

told my mother

thank you

on behalf of the neighbors

instead of screaming

at her

brown potions

and blue poisons

burning my knees,

my nubs,

and she just nodded

and said,

“That’s nice of them,”

in a way that sounded like

thank you

meant absolutely nothing

to her

but I kept talking

as a way

to deal with the pain

without yelling

because I hated

the smoke

she blew in my face

if I yelled–

it stank

and made me sleepy

and I always woke up hungry

and covered

in more rashes

and boils

than I thought she had bottles–

so I said

thank you

from Grimini,

thank you

from Pireye

thank you

from Griselda,

thank you

from Jisel,

thank you

from Rufel

thank you

from Puff,

thank you

from Jaimz

thank you

from Brainz

thank you

from Hype

thank you

from Pipe,

thank you

thank you

thank you

thank you–

and she nodded

and said

it’s good

that you’re learning

the names

of the patients,

maybe

you can start

running packages

for me

and I

didn’t dare point out

that my nubs

instead of hands

probably couldn’t

carry much

but obviously she knew that

so I think

what she really meant was,

all the thank you’s

coming out of my mouth

were annoying her–

so I recited names in my head

instead,

but not of neighbors;

thank you Jasper

thank you Blur

thank you Hitup

thank you Lolee

thank you Pup

thank you Zoe

thank you

all the other

street rats

I follow for food,

thank you

stray cats

for licking off that one potion

that stuck my elbow to my side like glue,

thank you

back door

thank you

dry floor

thank you

library

with all that lore

I hope you’ll wait for me

when I’m done with these chores.

***

thanks

And I didn’t scream

at all.

***

flopa and skapa

In the lopsided library

I did research

and nobody bothered me

because I went

in the middle of the night

when the whole thing was locked up.

I got in with the rats

where they had a hole

near the mud roof–

I’d widened the hole

ages ago

with a spade

until I could slide through,

and now

we went in together

and the rats

usually snuck in

just to eat the librarians’

leftover lunches,

and I would’ve joined them

but they looked annoyed at me

whenever I got close to the meals

so I just went

to the books

(stacks and stacks of books)

and read

about

dragons

and shapeshifting demons,

by the light

of a glow lure–

all the fishing boats had ‘em,

hanging off their sides

and attached to the fishing poles,

so the fishers never knew I took them all the time,

plus the sticks only glowed

for a few days

anyway

so they were constantly

making new ones

and might not notice just one missing,

not that I ever let myself rely

on that assumption,

I always put them back before morning.

So by the light

of carefully held glow lures

I read

   stacks

and stacks

      of books

and peeled apart

pages holding paradise.

***

find my published book at this link